Imperator Novus Vestis


What imbecile thought up the idea of Jeggings? Those of you who don’t know about Jeggings (and I would imagine that’s 99% of you) soon will be exposed to the sight of fashion conscious (i.e.: gullible) young women parading on the high streets and ground floor of Selfridges in these hideously unflattering abominations. As the name probably tells you, these Jeggings are a combination of Jeans and Leggings. Clever, eh? Once again young women are being bamboozled into making themselves look stupid. Obviously we can all wear what we want even if others think we look funny, but surely there comes a point when you can’t fool all of the people all of the time. Jeggings are ‘on trend’ this season along with Tweed, The equestrian look, Hi Tops and The Orthopedic boot for compensation of leg length deformities (United States Patent 4057914).

And another thing; since when did Roman sandals look flattering? Not on ancient Romans I would have thought. I can’t imagine that Centurions, Auxillia, Praetorians and comitatus praesentales were big on Pedicures. Now we have all manner of feet peeking out from straps and buckles. If feet and specifically toes are on display they need to be presentable. In much the same way as I wouldn’t dream of exposing my torso to the masses.

So Jeggings and Roman sandals are deemed to be all the rage this summer, by a panel of experts and marketeers. To my mind it smacks of The Adventures of Asterix the Gaul meets Max Wall.

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